‘Helen And The Bear’: Hot Docs Review

Dir: Alix Blair. US. 2024. 81mins

What makes a happy marriage? The question weaves throughout Helen And The Bear, a moving portrait of the decades-long relationship between former US Congressman Pete McCloskey and his wife Helen, two indomitable forces who have weathered several storms and arrived at their golden years — where fresh challenges await.

 Makes their complicated marriage resonate while offering insightful glimpses into each spouse’s personality

The solo feature debut of the couple’s neice, documentarian Alix Blair, Helen And The Bear, which premiered at Hot Docs, could inspire comparisons to other recent vibrant real-life love stories, such as The Eternal Memory and Fire Of Love, which went on to earn Best Documentary Oscar nominations. Emmy-winning documentarian Kirsten Johnson (Dick Johnson Is Dead) serves as executive producer, and strong reviews could lead to solid arthouse play. 

The film is told primarily from the perspective of Helen, who married her much-older husband when he was a congressman after serving on his staff. She long wrestled with the constricting role of being a wife, one of many obstacles that imperilled their marriage. And yet, Helen And The Bear argues persuasively that all couples must weather hardships and conflicting worldviews in order to survive — and, in fact, those challenges may end up actually tightening their bond.

Blair, who previously co-directed 2016’s Farmer/Veteran, draws from Helen’s journals to paint a picture of a former California hippie, aged 70 at the time of filming, who has spent much of her life searching for a contentment that often seemed just out of reach. Questioning her sexuality and dabbling in drugs, Helen fell for Paul N. ‘Pete’ McCloskey, Jr, a former Marine and attorney who served in the US Congress from 1967 to 1983. But although they have been married since 1982, their relationship has been bumpy — both of them had affairs — and, at 96, Pete is starting to see his health decline. After years together, Helen must face the possibility of being alone and decide what she wants her future to look like. 

Helen’s writing, which is presented unadorned on screen, is poetic and melancholy, chronicling her discontented love life and, later, her infatuation with Pete, who has been given the affectionate nickname ‘The Bear’. Editor Katrina Taylor moves smoothly between past and present, sometimes marrying archival footage of Helen with recent images of the older woman.

Helen And The Bear contends that every life is in flux, constantly evolving, and Helen is candid about her chronic dissatisfactions, despite her loving long-term relationship. Her penetrating, flinty eyes are an indication of her uncompromising spirit as she recalls how Pete, who was previously married with four children, pursued her relentlessly. But even though they eventually wed, she never gave up her independence – which included being in a same-sex relationship for years during the marriage.

The film’s subjects are not well-known – although Pete made headlines in the early 1970s as one of the few Republicans who condemned the Vietnam War, even challenging then-President Richard Nixon in the 1972 primary. (In 2007, he officially renounced his affiliation with the Republican Party, becoming a Democrat.) But Blair, with a sense of restraint and critical distance, makes their complicated marriage resonate while offering insightful glimpses into each spouse’s personality. During an especially striking sequence, Blair interviews one of Pete’s grown daughters from his previous marriage — he and Helen did not have children of their own — and she details how distant he was during her childhood, so obsessed with his political career that he had little time for his family. Pete offers no resistance, admitting that he was an absent father and husband, regrets he still carries with him.

Despite their failings — or, perhaps, because of them — Helen and Pete ultimately emerge as an inspiring couple, having learned to absorb life’s difficulties while focusing on the abiding adoration they have for one another. As devoted as she is to him, Helen has always been her own person, and Pete’s growing frailty reinforces her realisation that she is, at heart, a perpetually solitary soul — for better or worse.

With Blair serving as her own cinematographer, capturing so many intimate and unguarded moments, Helen And The Bear is profound about commitment and happiness, recognising that these are moving targets, almost impossible to pin down. No marriage is perfect, but some are lucky enough to stand the test of time.